An urbane and sophisticated man e-mailed me. He said, "I haven't lived in Lancaster in a long time but I believe your skyline is not of Lancaster."
"Nonsense," I said. "If you look closely you can see the Griest Building."
"I hate to differ," he wrote back, "but I don't see the Griest Building. I believe your skyline may be of Philadelphia."
Well, I immediately went to see my webmaster/lawyer/accountant/technical advisor/cultural icon and spiritual guru.
I said, "I wanted a skyline picture of Lancaster. I've been told you put in Philadelphia. What's up with that?"
"Listen, nut-job," he said. "You haven't paid me in twenty years. You find a picture of the Lancaster skyline. You wanted a skyline. I gave you a skyline. If you're Real Smart you'll keep telling people it's Lancaster and sooner or later they will believe you."
"I have raised you well, my son," I said.
"Be easy," he said. "Just be easy." (Have you heard that one, Newthud?)
So, Harv2, you keep looking, have a little of that Clyde coffee, (we'll discuss where you can get it later) and I promise that sooner or later you will see the Griest Building (Let me know, okay?) JohnQincy, you seem somewhat of a fence-sitter to me. Did you call me psycho? Now, you really need to have some coffee with Clyde. Maybe then you could build me a speed bump? The cars really fly up my street! Yeah, I'm trying to lay off the stuff. Unfortunately, this site-studio software I bought is crap. I can't even figure out how to make paragraphs. So, I've called in the big guns (no, no Riverfat, I don't need the AK-47 yet. Please stay home and wait for Kitty to knock. Drink enough of Clyde's coffee and you'll think it's a Gunsmoke episode. Be easy.) We're going to upgrade the software. Anyone have any suggestions? Frontpage, Dreamweaver? The e-mail button works and I'll be easy.
P.S. George, how could I forget you. The Lancaster Ski Club. Brilliant. (I still want to know what a "stoop" is.) Mine are waxed and ready. Where are we going? I haven't been snowed, have I?